singlelogbridge | Inbox: Ximilia

[ he doesn't argue the first point; after all, he's true — though perhaps instead of turning on him, they would have made fun of him, thought him soft, and he'd have made no difference. if the lan elders turned even on lan wangji for his actions, what could nie huaisang have accomplished?

(much, he thinks, but only if he got started early enough. the soft boy he used to be couldn't have — but the viper that now looks at him in the mirror, forced to mold himself into the shadow of his worst enemy... he could. he will.)

his brow furrows as wei wuxian keeps speaking, though; the more he says, the quicker huaisang thinks back to little things, things he remembers from a childhood visit to lotus pier, from rumors that he heard and dismissed, from interactions witnessed years ago and some more recently.

the more wei wuxian says, the more things slot into place in huaisang's mind. ]

Wei-xiong, [ he says, fan fluttering in his hand, voice carefully light, a touch confused, ] What do you mean the Jiangs suffered for it? The Jiangs suffered because of Wen Ruohan, not because of you. What happened to Lotus Pier... it wasn't your fault.

[For a long moment, his eyes rest elsewhere, unfocused gaze staring out over the fabricated shape of Jinlintai. He'd forgotten momentarily that Huaisang was not present inside of the Xuanwu cave to see Wei Wuxian taunt Wen Chao and take him captive. For a moment he considers sharing the story, explaining to his friend how that incident was likely what had finalized the target on Yunmeng Jiang's back.

Instead of explaining, he remembers the burning of Lotus Pier, Madam's Yu's shrieked accusations, and the pressure of Jiang Cheng's fingers wrapped around his throat. Your fault. All your fault.

Yunmeng Jiang would have taken casualties in the war, but Wen Chao came to the steps of Lotus Pier because of him. Madam Yu wasn't wrong. Jiang Cheng wasn't wrong. The smile he turns on Huaisang is weak and doesn't reach his eyes.]

Hmm, of course, you're right.

[He wouldn't understand and Wei Wuxian has no desire to debate this truth. Easier then, to say what will be easier for his friend to stomach.]

[ hm, he thinks, and commits this conversation to memory. will he ever find what exactly happened? unlikely, though from what information trickled to qinghe from the attack, and what he was able to piece together from jiang cheng's scathing comments after it all had been over — one here, one there, non-sequiturs in that their content only jiang cheng himself had the context for... but huaisang did not forget.

will not forget.

he smiles at wei wuxian as if relieved that his friend is in agreement, waves his hand as if quickly dismissing the topic. ]

Well — we're here now, aren't we? We can make it all right again. What did you wish for? For the attack not to happen?

[ it is cruel, this — but he needs to see. ]

[It isn't a surprise that Huaisang asks, but it does strike him as slightly discordant given the nature of their conversation here. Then again, it is Huaisang. With a somewhat wry smile, Wei Wuxian shakes his head.]

That would do nothing for the Wen remnant. [And if Jiang Cheng didn't lose his core, if Wei Wuxian didn't sacrifice his own, who knows if he'd have gained the power to win the war?]

But this is such a dreary topic, Nie-xiong, haven't we been dwelling on the past for long enough? Let's go have a drink!

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